In the world of worms, there is one Annelida who rises above all other worms and his name is Willowby Wormington. He’s not like other worms. He’s vocal while others behave like the worms that they are, silent, afraid to speak their minds. He’s not afraid to take on the Whora Ingrates, Rash Limburgers, Hen Peckers, Man Holsters, or Salamander Blingriches of the world.
A graduate of the International College of Hard Rocks as well as Dirt University, he holds advanced degrees in Geology, Botany, Archeology, Biology, and the Earth Sciences. He's a Doctor of Letters as well as being a Master Gardener.
Willowby is too old to count, even if one counted his many rings, but has been living for centuries. Some believe it’s his healthy lifestyle. Others say it’s because he once ate an alien sprout. Whatever the reason, his longevity has made him wiser than any living thing on Planet Earth, nicknamed The Wisdom Worm or The Worm of Wisdom, especially by those dumber than dirt.
He invented composting and was the first living soul to practice organic gardening in the Garden of Eden. It was his tree from which God grew Adam’s infamous apple.
He constantly thinks outside the bin and Willowby’s mica-sharp wit is downright wicked. Those who are lucky enough to meet him are in awe of his wit which is welcomed throughout the world by those who just don’t have enough of their own (a condition caused by having too many of the genes which cause witlessness).
He’s been everywhere and seen everything, but he’s not a snob nor an elitist, and never looks down on people. In fact, he looks up to people and is not ashamed to do so. He’s honest, perhaps to a fault, but one cannot fault him for speaking his mind when others are afraid to. He says out loud what others only think. Where would this world be without Willowby Wormington? One wiggles to think.
